Sunday, December 15, 2013

Baba

We only knew him as Baba. He was my paternal grandmother's house help. A World War I and II veteran, who lost his family in India to a plague in the 1930s, came to Pakistan in 1947, and met my grandmother in 1950. (I'll have to confirm the dates with my mother - it was the year my uncle was born and my grandmother, who was a school teacher had to rejoin her job after maternity leave)

When he knocked on the door, he looked very frail, so Ammajee tried to offer him food. But he refused. His self respect was great and he felt insulted by her 'charitable' offer. Instead, he asked her for work. My grandmother needed a nanny and a house help, so she asked Baba if he can cook. He responded in affirmative to cooking, cleaning and taking care of a newborn. Hence, he was hired.

His life, from what I have heard revolved around my uncle, whom he took care of for 16 years. One day, Baba disappeared and nobody was able to trace him. My grandparents lived in Jacoblines Quarters - one of the many areas inhabited by Urdu speaking migrants, apart from Martin Quarters, Jahangir Road Quarters, Abyssinia Lines and other neighbourhoods in the old city. In the 70s my grandparents resettled and later the quarters were demolished to make way for family residential apartments, measuring merely 45 square yards.

My mother tells me that one day, while my father was passing through the area, he found Baba living in a hut near some rubble. He had broken his leg, and had taken to begging. He also was suffering from some memory loss and chanted 'Allah hoo' almost all the time. My father brought him home, where his condition, despite visits to doctors deteriorated, and he continued to beg in our neighbourhood.

I remember as a kid, many people told my parents to hand him over to Edhi, since he was not even a relative, but a ‘mere old servant’, who begged and made everyone feel ashamed. However, my parents persevered. He stayed with us, despite his cursing and hurling insults at my mother and aunt for not giving preference to ‘boys’, for not taking enough care of children, and for not getting him the desired ‘tambaakoo wala paan’ in 25 paisas. He loved paan, apart from begging to save for his ‘funeral’.

Often, his demands were to buy him two Zahoor Rajajani Tambakoo Paans in 50 paisas. Even though, we told him countless of times that Baba, a paan costs 75 paisas now, and not 25. Since he never listened, we always used to cover up for the missing money. Baba loved feeding us kids ‘nihari roti’ with the money he begged. And of course, we loved eating it with him too - despite our runny noses and hiccups.

Baba was an era, almost a century, who left us when he was 95 years old. That was the first time when I found his last rites had to be performed in a different way. My chacha went to a Sunni maulvi to find out if he could be taken care of at an Imambargah, since we were not keen on sending him to Edhi. At that time, Sunni mosques were not equipped to deal with dead bodies. This was early 90s. He was a Hanafi Sunni, who had no trouble eating niaz, nazar or giving fateha. He had already bought a white shroud from begged money, which he had, a few months ago given to my mother with instructions for his burial.

Baba wished to be buried the Sunni way, and his grave was to be left un-cemented. With permission from a relevant Sunni maulvi, Baba was bathed and shrouded at an Imambargah, amid a mixed Shia and Sunni funerary gathering. He was buried the Sunni way, with the help of the Sunni side in our family. Nobody had a problem with the way it happened. Nobody had trouble setting foot in the Imambargah at that time, and nobody asked if he was a Deobandi, Ahle Hadees, Barelvi or Wahabi. We were tolerant then!

Friday, December 13, 2013

Pontification via pornification

This is one of the articles that started it.

Why Is Everyone Getting Naked? Rashida Jones on the Pornification of Everything

For many, Rashida Jones has actually pontificated by raising the questions she did manage to raise, despite the whole idea that women’s emancipation lies in the act of rubbing their clits and baring their boobs in public. So here I am, wondering, how Rihanna's clit will get me emancipated? Or make men question how unjust society is towards women? How does Miley's butt swinging and tongue flicking at a crowd make people question taboos about women's sexuality? Oh for Pete’s sake, how do even FEMEN’s bare boobs make Muslim fanatics less fanatic?

These are the questions that keep nagging at me, just like Imran Khan’s constant demands to block NATO supply and to shoot down Drones does. I feel the polarity of our society is becoming too much to bear. Here’s another wink worthy, boob jiggly theory. ‘Trolley Problem’, which allows one to support drones that kill innocent people as collateral, but at the same time, gives them leeway to oppose a death sentence. Ah the contradictions and lovely alibis one can find theoretically in the archives of Wikipedia the great.

Or as my friend Aamer puts it, “It's the zombie apocalypse. No other explanation for so many people talking crazy shit, unaware that they're talking crazy shit.”

And if that were not crazy enough for you, try Jezebel. Where Erin Gloria Ryan claims that 'Smartphones Are Made For Giant Man-Hands'. Oblivious to I guess the countless smartphones available in the market that vary in size, specs and portability, as well as the varied physiques both men and women can possess.

Yes Aamer, either I need to be a zombie, or I need a spaceship.

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Pedophiles using Roman Urdu, Facebook clueless

A friend sent a message today to report a page run with the title 'Yar araam sai daalo dard ho raha hai', which literally means 'Do it gently, its hurting'. A close look reveals that it is to do with child pornography. The page is being run as a "Community - Payaray larkay jin ki gaand maarni chahie" - Pretty boys, who should be sodomized. Here's a screen capture for further proof:


After reporting the page, I suggested the friend to post the link in our group Pak Feminazi Drones, so more people can report the matter to Facebook. A series of reports followed, all of which received the same answer from Facebook community. Interestingly, as Mariam Goraya pointed out, though Facebook has a problem with images of nipples, its all right to have child pornography on the social platform, as long as its not written in English. Seriously, you need to look deeper into the language issue Facebook.


Countless images of young boys are splashed across the group, inviting, inciting, enticing for only pedophiles. I am feeling disgusted even writing the matter, but unfortunately, the multiple responses by Facebook, not just to me, but others as well, left me no choice but to blog about the matter. Check the responses here:



Since the social media website found nothing wrong with the content on the page, and instead told us:
Thank you for taking the time to report something that you feel may violate our Community Standards. Reports like yours are an important part of making Facebook a safe and welcoming environment. We reviewed the page you reported to containing nudity or pornography and found it doesn’t violate our Community Standards.
Note: If you have an issue with something on the page, be sure to report the content (ex: a photo), not the entire page. That way, your report will be more accurately reviewed.
I thought, all right, fine, maybe reporting a picture with a child's image, along with an unsettling title would make Facebook realize the problem. And I reported an image - https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1420373504850981 - that did not change much either. The title simply means, "Take off your knickers and lie on your stomach" (Uggghhhh - hire some people who know Roman Urdu Facebook, please!!!!)

Unfortunately, the result of this report was the same as well. Facebook community standards cannot be violated when using Roman Urdu. Since probably they do not have enough competent people on board to decipher language. They have people who can pinpoint images of breastfeeding, but not these.
Thank you for taking the time to report something that you feel may violate our Community Standards. Reports like yours are an important part of making Facebook a safe and welcoming environment. We reviewed the page you reported to containing nudity or pornography and found it doesn't violate our Community Standards.


Facebook Community standards not only need to improve, they need to be updated and better equipped to understand such matters. Also, the options to report pedophilia, child porn, pedophiles need to be made more easy and understandable. The reporting options on images are stupid. Have a look:


If you choose option two "It's harassing me or someone I know", this is what Facebook has to say:


And you are back to square one, "Report it to Facebook" - Continue:


So here we are again, back to square one. Let's wait for another Facebook message, "Thank you for taking the time to report something that you feel may violate our Community Standards. Reports like yours are an important part of making Facebook a safe and welcoming environment. We reviewed the page you reported to containing nudity or pornography and found it doesn’t violate our Community Standards."

PS The wait is over. Here we got the expected Facebook response:






Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Sacred flight

Stop time if you can
Live in eternity
For no clock will ever give you that,
It’s too long to wait
Dismal too,
Through agony,
Continue
In sleepless bliss of night
Turning into light,
Catching sunrays on windowpanes
Burning bright
As pigeons knock
Make you rise
To grim realities
Soaked dreams
Placid crumbs of self,
That delights in sacred flight!

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Stigma: A major barrier to Suicide Prevention

Yesterday was World Suicide Prevention Day. And I feel weird to know that an online friend of mine felt so dejected and hopeless that he took his own life. He was depressed and could not see any point in continuing. He posted many times about his abusive father, and this week, after being physically assaulted, called police on him. However, that was not fruitful either. I do not know what transpired between the police and him. All I know is that he wasn't helped when he needed.

I never met him in real, only interacted online. According to him, his therapist had not called him for weeks. So, he mostly relied on friends. For, expecting support from his family was useless. It is not only sad, but cruel on so many levels.

May he rest in peace now. Away from the cycle of abuse, helplessness and dejection. Away from doctors like Shazia Nawaz, who cannot stop abusing someone with mental health problems. I wonder what kind of a doctor would say this on the Facebook wall of a person, who died only a few hours ago?


How many doctors are out there who tell their patients they are just pretending? And how many doctors tell their patients that they need to live for 'abusive parents'. I quote Dr Shazia Nawaz here: "World does not remember USELESS DEPRESSED people." World can do well without doctors like you Shazia Nawaz, I hope her license gets canceled.

If you thought that was moronic, please see our enlightened doctor comparing suicide with murder. Basically as per the 'doctor' a person who kills someone else and a person who kills 'self' is the same.



There are many reasons people with suicide ideation do not get timely help. Including doctors like Shazia Nawaz and others who say shit like 'attention seeker', 'weak', 'drama queen', etc. Criminalization of suicide is not much help either.

International Association for Suicide Prevention (IASP) and WHO cosponsored World Suicide Prevention Day on September 10. The theme was “Stigma: A Major Barrier for Suicide Prevention.” Nearly a million people die of suicides a year. The figures do not include the number of 'attempts' people make to commit suicide.

I feel awful and weird. He posted his picture with a rope, before he hung himself. Perhaps the final cry of a helpless being, stuck in limbo.


Note: The name has not been mentioned, so people like Shazia do not abuse him further.






Friday, September 6, 2013

Rabid Misogynist Syndrome in 'rational' men?

The world is filled with men suffering from rabid misogyny. Their view about women works in a binary. "The woman I approached and spoke to me easily is a slut, and the one who shunned me is a bitch." Either way, they love indulging in slut shaming. The height of misogyny being mainstream can be gauged from the fact that even men, who want to be identified as feminists end up showing symptoms of advanced "Rabid Misogyny Syndrome".

They repeatedly call a woman, who 'dares' to counter their bullshit a bitch. Oh, and if the bitch dares to point that they are being stereotypical, she deserves some more 'bitching'. So, one might think, wow that is so original and this guy is a lovely feminist I would never want to trust in handling "women's issues". Unless, of course one was a doormat or suffering from "mother hen syndrome". Thinking that talking 'nice' to an angry young man would not only help appease my 'motherly instincts', but also keep me as their leader.

Here's an example from the perpetual Rabid Misogynists (profile 1, 2 and 3) from a group called Rationalist Society of Pakistan (ironic, I know) who my friend Mariam loves to call a rabid dog.


In case you did not have enough of the intellectualism of this brilliant man, try reading the remaining thread filled with more rationalism, interspersed with 'bitch' as the best epithet another 'enlightened man' could come up with.


More fun here:


Oh, and not to forget he runs a page and magazine too called Rationalist Society of Pakistan. I wonder why all these narcissist men, wanting to be leaders of some sort want to identify themselves as some liberal, feminists, leftist brilliants who the 'women of Pakistan' had the good fortune to interact with. Worse are the admins and people associated with this RSOP group, who do not take a stand against such behavior. No disciplinary action is taken against these men, and the best thing they do is, send private apologies. Here's the last apology sent by RSOP founder Haider Shah on June 18, 2013, after a shitstorm created by the same misogynist man Waqas Goraya.


PS A later update, where the intelligent man decided to gift, all the women who countered his bullshit, some pads. Apparently, women who had the guts to counter this pseudo-intelligent excuse of a man, are PMSing. More misogynist bull crap by Rationalist Society of Pakistan admin.


The mushrooming of these countless rationalist, humanist, secularist societies on the Pakistani interwebs is nothing more than a gimmick to gain international attention. They use feminism as a mere 'selling point'.


NOTE: To read the screenshots, please click on the image.

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Setbacks in teaching history

In a deeply religious society, where students want to find answers for everything in religion, threats include being labeled a blasphemer. One of my students today asked for evidence of god. Especially after understanding the beginning of religion and links to agriculture, destructive forces of nature and the ultimate belief in a monotheistic god.

As a teacher in University of Karachi, its difficult to state openly, that belief, has no links to logic, evidence and reason. I received a threat last semester to not speak about religion at all or I will be responsible for consequences. The problem is, should I ignore valid questions by students? Should I discourage students from questioning, and tell them to merely accept everything? Would that not be dishonest? I think it would not only be dishonest of me to do so, but also stunt the mental growth of young minds eagerly searching for answers.

It would be very easy to merely give a lecture and ask students to learn it by heart. Something that our education system is well known for. Perhaps, if religion, any religion was based in facts and evidence, the religious people would not feel so threatened by a questioning mind. For a student, who grew up on anti-polytheist propaganda, polytheism comes with a backup of reasoning for belief, including the importance of the Sun and water in an agricultural society, and the moon in desert-nomadic societies. In this case, the burden of proof becomes far greater on monotheistic religions. Unfortunately, the monotheistic god is beyond the five sensory perceptions and seems to have no refuge, but one in the human psychology, incapable of understanding that existence is for no reason and with no purpose.

Whereas, worshiping the sun makes sense for a person growing crops in Mesopotamia, because without the sunlight, crops will not grow. Revering the moon in the desert is understandable, as it helps illuminate the sand dunes, and the trader does not get lost. Fearing the mighty River is logical because it can destroy villages and crops in seconds. But what does an unseen, unheard, untasted, unsmelt and untouched god do?

These things cannot be said out loud really, but can only be hinted at by stating and repeating that keeping evidence and belief separate is the best available option; belief is blind; that we never found 40-yard tall human skeletons; or that early humans had low life expectancy because of predators, health concerns, etc, etc.  Noah's age is not the only problem here. The floods were raging with safety issues, for Noah, allegedly 900 years old as per Islamic mythology has a lot in common with Utnapishtim from the Epic of Gilgamesh and Manu of the Puranas. That mythology is a word kept by Muslims for other religions, as theirs is 'undoubtedly the divine' one.

It is a dangerous world out there, I told my students, as the class broke into a cacophony of questions.

PS Architecturally speaking, we have far more temples, palaces and forts to study compared to the common man's house. Just like in earthquakes and floods, the rich man's haveli and the mullah's mosque survive. Not because of divine intervention but because of better materials.